Fear Not!!

So I started chemo last week and....

it was horrible!  I came home the first day and felt fine and all of a sudden my body got hot and I hurt!  I remember my mom taking me to drop off Cameron at church and I was just praying for God to give me strength to make it.  I will never forget as soon as I finished my prayer Cameron said "Mommy can we just go home so I can cuddle with you and watch a show."  I never had a prayer answered so quickly.  There was no way I could make it to drop him off. 

Day two was not much better but at least I could walk.  All I could remember was Psalm 23

Even though I walk

through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

To some that sounds scary but to me it was music.  When I first was diagnosed with cancer our Sunday school teacher (Maury Gill) taught a lesson on Psalm 23.  He pointed out that we do not run or walk fast in trials but we walk, and let me tell you these past few days have felt like a slow crawl, but I had peace in knowing Jesus was there holding my hand.  I just kept saying over and over do not fear Cecily Holm for God is with me.

During all this I receive a care package in the mail from a women that I just met.  Her name is Laura and she had breast cancer 10 years ago but she loves the Lord and had some great advice to give me the days before I started chemo.  Anyhow she sent me a bracelet that has Hebrews 13:5 inscribed in it "Never will I leave you or forsake you" 

Ok so to me it was like having front row tickets to Randy Travis or Kenny Rodgers!  I mean seriously!!!!!  Now not only was I chanting " Do not fear Cecily Holm for God is with me and He will NEVER leave me or forsake me!" and I had the bracelet to squeeze in my had. 

God is good all the time no matter what and I have to say the day I got hooked up to chemo will be forever etched in my mind but for those of you who didn't read my facebook post this is what I posted

 Jan. 18 11:03 AM Just got hooked up to my drip and opened my Beth Moore James study the opening verse is " consider it great joy my brother whenever you experience various trials knowing the testing of your faith produces endurance James 1: 2-3

It's true!  I have ran marathons which require some endurance and these past few days were harder then any marathon. I know I have many more hard days to come but today was Good!!

Keeping Busy!

A few years ago my husband and I went to Fredicksburg for our anniversary.  We found this fun sign and a few month later my husband came home with this super fun tricycle. 

This is when it all began.  We decided to redo our house.  I began painting everything and shopping at garage sales, thrift stores, Old Oak Cottage, Ellen's Timeless Treasures, and other local places.  We also had some fun things passed down to us that I wasn't displaying but loved.

Here are some photos of some fun things we found and some things I painted!  Beware there are a lot of pictures and I'm not a great photographer or designer. 

I got these fun things below from my Dad and Uncle for Christmas!!! 

I'm loving this rocker in our living room!

Below is the entry way!

The laundry room was fun!  I painted the walls and the cabinets.  My husband found this fun paper at the top and I pinned it on the wall.  I loved the idea of being able to switch out the paper easily if I wanted.

This is our office!  ignore the Ronald McDonald He was a White Elephant gift and I have friends sign it when they drop of food for me or visit me.  He didn't make it to the hospital... We forgot him...

I repainted our kitchen cabinets after surgery.  I was super board and sad I couldn't run so I painted.  My uncle helped me put on the wax.  That was the hard part for me.

That's all the pictures for now!!  Thanks for stopping by!

GODincidences

So much has been going on that the days have gone by too fast to count.  I can say that I am so excited to go on so many adventures with Jesus lately.  I know that sounds odd to hear someone say that after all the things I have been going through.  The way I see it is you have two ways to look at this:  “Why do I have to endure this, why me?”  The other way to look at it is “ok, let’s go Jesus.  I’m ready for the adventure.  Take me under your wings and lead the way.” 

I said a while back that I have seen Jesus in so many ways lately but let me just share some of the Godincidences: 

#1:   I was almost out of gas and could not find a gas station to save my life.  Finally with about 6 miles to left in my tank I find one.  I had to go inside to pay and as I walked in smiling and asking the cashier how she was she said “Great and you keep smiling  honey because it just made my day!!”  I pumped my gas and I kept feeling God’s gentle nudge pushing me to go give her a prayer bracelet.  As I walked in I felt so stupid I was letting the devil tell me that she didn’t care about me and why would she want to pray for me.  Who am I to have her take time out of her day and pray.   I pushed the enemy away and shared my story with her.  She came around the desk with tears in her eyes as I told her I have cancer and will have surgery Friday.  I held out a prayer bracelet and asked her to pray for me.  She asked how I was so happy and I said because of Jesus.  I know He has everything under control.  She asked what my verse meant and I told her to go look it up.  Now I’m not sure what will come out of that and I may never know, but I guarantee you this I have definitely planted a seed for Jesus!!!

#2:  December 8^th,  the day before surgery, I had so many errands to run.  I was feeling a little overwhelmed.  I took the kids to school and realized I hadn’t eaten yet.  I could go home and waste time or stop by Starbucks and use my gift card.  I knew there wasn’t much on there and I only had two dollars in hand.  So I prayed to God that I had enough on my gift card to cover this as I ordered a small coffee and some oatmeal.  I prayed and prayed the entire way through the car line and when I reached the window to pay the guy said “No need to pay.  The lady in front of you said Merry Christmas and God Bless!”  I started bawling.  The poor guy at the counter didn’t know what to do he just kept asking if I was ok.  I had to pull over and cry for about 10 minutes.  I just felt God’s hand on my shoulder patting my back saying, “Cecily I have this. Right down to your breakfast.”

I love that sign from Dayspring that reads “God is Good All the time.”  Every time I get in a situation I’m unsure of I think of that saying.  No matter what your situation God is Good All the time.  We all just need to think of the positive and not the negative.  I find it easier to say okay God how do you want me to use this situation for you.  Sometimes I feel like just going through what He gives you with a smile is good enough.

Thanks again for all the kind words, prayers and help from family and friends!!  We love y’all!!

Balanced Living

I talk a lot about nutrition, but today I want to talk a little about living a balanced life.  I was reminded today after hearing a radio show, about how obsessed women can be about getting in shape and being thin.  Being "thin" should not be ones ultimate goal in life.  If it is your # 1 goal, watch out!  It can become an obsession and possibly a prison.  I've never believed that "thin" equals good or that it should be the only goal one should strive for.  Actually, there are many unhealthy "thin" women who actually have high body fat, not enough muscle, and probably as a result, have weak bones too.  There is so much more to be gained when one starts down the road of eating right and working out than just getting to and maintaining a look.  After you are in a good routine where you consistently work out 4-6 days/week and eat healthy, you will reach your body's best potential.  Then you need to accept the body that brings you.  We all have different body types and we will not all look the same when we are the healthiest we can be.

 

So what am I saying?  Becoming healthy should be our ultimate goal.  And that includes all parts of ourselves.  We are made up of body, mind and spirit.  Make sure you are feeding each part of you.  Make sure you are in balance.  Don't get caught up in the trap of living your life around counting calories all day and becoming obsessed with it.  Yes we need to learn about calories, educate ourselves on how to consume calories throughout the day to keep our metabolisms fired up, but make sure to enjoy life.  Enjoy food.  Enjoy books.  Enjoy friends and family.  Enjoy church.  Enjoy prayer.  Enjoy fitness.  Enjoy your hobbies.  Feed your faith.  Feed your knowledge.  Feed your body.  Train your body.  Sleep.  Exercise.  Eat.  Read.  Pray.  Love.  Laugh.  Relax.  Play.

An Update On Me

I’m doing well.  Doctor appointments have been a bit overwhelming and I must say the stress is starting to get to me.  (All I want to do is sleep.)  I am however continuing to run, but after about five or six miles I’m so tired!  And while I run it is odd to feel like my chest has it’s own heart beat.  But the most difficult time while running is trying to let my mind wander because that little heartbeat in my left breast is a constant reminder that things have changed so dramatically.  It’s okay though.  I just take one step at a time and before I know it I’m done with my run and back home again.

All the food friends are bringing me is so nice.  Corey and I were very reluctant at first to accept the offer to create a food calendar but now that I’m gone so much I’m glad we caved.  It’s great not to have to worry about what to cook for the kids.  I was getting tired of sandwiches and cereal!!! 

The other night a friend brought us dinner after a long day at the doctor and after we ate I took Cameron to a birthday party.  On the way he said that he was sad I was unable to pick him up from school as much.  I knew then that was God’s cue to tell him what’s going on.  I proceeded to explain that mommy was sick and there are times when one of mommy’s friends would pick him up.  I also told him that some of our friends would be bringing us dinner.  He looked out the window for a few minutes and said "so… will we always get dessert? Because that would be so awesome!"  I just laughed and said "maybe honey."  I was a little worried he didn’t understand what I said but that night when he said his prayers he said "Dear God I hope you sleep good tonight and please help my mommy feel better soon."  Out of the mouth of babes.

Like I said this is all overwhelming but I have been able to see God work in my life like never before.

Walk A Mile For Me

Hi Friends,

Thank you so much for praying for me.  It means so much to know that there are so many people behind me.  I have had so many questions so here’s the deal.  

I was watching t.v. one night with my hands behind my head.  I had an itch under my arm and when I went to scratch it there was a pea size knot there.  I knew I had a well-woman’s check-up in a week so I put it in the back of my mind until then.  The appointment was two days after my 30^th birthday.  I showed my doctor and she ordered an ultrasound and scheduled it for the following Monday.  (Let’s just say that was the day the whirlwind began.)  I went to the appointment thinking I would be there an hour and was there for four hours.  The moment the probe touched my chest I knew things weren’t looking good.  I had a mammogram that same day and within an hour after leaving the doctor I had a call from the specialist saying to come in the next day.  I had that appointment and five minutes after leaving they squeezed me in for a biopsy the next day.  I found out Friday that I do indeed have breast cancer.

The awesome thing is that I know God has a plan for me.  I know He has everything under control.  I know that 1 in 4 women (not sure of the odds exactly) get this and I consider myself the lucky one.  God knows that I can handle this.  He knows that I will NOT sit in a corner and throw myself a pity party.  I will let His light shine.  (If any of you truly know me, you know I am a stress ball.)  It is God's grace that I am okay with this.  I WILL fight this head on. It’s just another marathon, but this time I have tons of friends and family cheering me on.  The spectators are for me and my hope and prayer is that through me you will see God's handy work.  I promise you this. 

I will keep you updated through this blog.  But in the mean time I challenge you to walk, run, bike, or rollerblade a mile for me.  It can be daily or weekly but walk a mile for me!  While you do, say a prayer for me and thank God for everything you have and are capable of doing.  Trust in the Lord in all you do and you will succeed!

Have a great day and remember to SWEAT!

Cecily

"Be joyful always* Pray continually* Give thanks in every circumstance" I Thessalonians 5:16-18  

Oh The Joys Of Running

It’s that time again…Marathon training is back in full swing.  Oh the joys of running.  I love it.  I feel like working out is my job.  Sometimes I do it when I’m sick or really don’t want to but as a fitness professional I have to push through those feelings and get it done. 

Running, on the other hand is me.  It’s who I am and what makes me happy.  I love hearing my own heart beating when I’m finished.  It is an amazing feeling to be able to hear your heart beating in your body and feel the rush of blood flowing in your veins.  Can you tell I love it?  I hate knowing I’m about to run 15 miles but Iove the thrill of finishing. It’s almost like getting on the Grease Lighting at Astroworld.  You are scared as you are putting your seatbelt on but the moment they say all clear it is so much fun. As soon as the ride is over you are running back to the front of the line to do it again.

You may not feel that way about running or working out but I know you feel the positive effects of getting your blood pumping.  Game on ladies!  Schools about to start, it’s about to get cooler, and your fitness journey can only get better.  We learn new things about ourselves daily. Not only about our character but about how strong we are and how much we can push our bodies a little more.  I love leaving camp everyday because I can feel the energy that each one of you exudes in your workouts. I know that through you I have accomplished what God has trusted me to do and that is the ability to push you just enough to help you reach your fitness goals. 

Have a great day ladies and remember to SWEAT!